Me:
hello, God
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
*********
God:
What's up, *********.
Me:
Nothing. Someone pointed me over to this site, so I decided to check it out

God:
Not a thing?

Who?
Me:
Some guy at some forum
God:
Some may guy at some forum, but not all.
Me:
that didn't make sense at all. Is that some sort of special God-talk?
God:
To me it makes perfect sense. Suppose I said yes.
Me:
I guess I should believe you, then
God:
What would happen if you didn't?
Me:
You'd smoke me with a giant thunderbolt?
God:
Who else would smoke you with a giant thunderbolt ?
Me:
Zeus, I guess... But then again, he's a fake, isn't he?
God:
That input matched my default category. Again, I don't know very many fake is not he.
Me:
You're playing with my brains!! :O!
God:
You think I am playing with your brains. Oh.
Me:
yes, that is what I think
God:
Far out. What is your rationale?
Me:
er... your lack of... sense?
God:
Um. You think I am lack of. Where are you located?
Me:
Good ol' Mexico!
God:
Thanks for the compliment. Tell me a little about your life in ol Mexico.
Me:
*censored*
God:
You're kidding. it is?
Me:
yes! :O!
God:
How do you know it is? Oh.
Me:
Because you're screwing with me
God:
Good reason. I have no reason to do that to you, *********.
Me:
yes you do, I'm just a pawn in your chess board
God:
Ayuh. No I do not you are just a pawn in my chess board. Do you?
I am always on the Web.
Me:
So, you own the internets?
God:
Interesting deduction. That's good information: ********* said I own the internets.
Me:
that's what I said, yes
God:
I know. I'm still thinking about it.
Me:
but, I thought you could think like, 1,000,000 friggin' light years a minute!
God:
I could but let's get back to that later.
Me:
k
God:
Ayuh.
Me:
hillbillie?
God:
What do you have that is ?
Me:
you, I guess...
God:
I haven't heard anything like that before: ********* said I he or she guess.
Me:
look, God, you're confusing me
God:
Sorry my eye is not attached right now.
Me:
ok, I'll leave you for now then
God:
Just for now? Congratulations. Great.
Me:
o...k... well, see ya later God -- probably in a couple years

God:
Well that's okay. I see. Woe! I am a Christian. I hear you.
Me:
...