The Banout: LOL BYE CHEEZY

[nek_]

So we'll wait till it comes around again, and this time with four part
harmony and feeling.

[nek_]

We're just waitin' for it to come around is what we're doing.

[nek_]

All right now.

[nek_]

You can get anything you want, at Alice's Restaurant
Excepting Alice
You can get anything you want, at Alice's Restaurant
Walk right in it's around the back
Just a half a mile from the railroad track
You can get anything you want, at Alice's Restaurant

[nek_]

Da da da da da da da dum
At Alice's Restaurant

[nek_]

There will now be a short intermission while I gloat, use the restroom, smoke a cigarette, find something else worth spamming and count up the current amount of posts.

[Elmdor]

No it won't.

I demand that GoI� gets modded, smodded, admined, retroed and banned. All at the same time.







It brings a smile to my face, as she hops with style and grace....
And nothing else makes me tick, like when she's on that pogo-stick...

[nek_]

I figure, that since everyone is all 'OMG Star Wars Episode III /ejaculate' I will post the script from something, a lot better.

Also, this is my 34th post.

[nek_]

The Star Wars
by
George Lucas



Rough Draft [First of four major screenplay drafts]
Lucasfilm Ltd.
5/74

1. FADE IN:

SPACE

A sea of stars is broken by the vast blue surface of the planet, Utapau. Five
small moons slowly drift into view from the far side of the planet. The main
titles are followed by a roll-up:

Until the recent Great Rebellion, the Jedi Bendu were the most feared warriors
in the universe. For one hundred thousand years, generations of Jedi
perfected their art as the personal bodyguards of the emperor. They were the
chief architects of the invincible Imperial Space Force which expanded the
Empire across the galaxy, from the celestial equator to the farthest reaches
of the Great Rift.

Now these legendary warriors are all but extinct. One by one they have been
hunted down and destroyed as enemies of the New Empire by a ferocious and
sinister rival warrior sect, the Knights of Sith.

A small silver spacecraft emerges from behind one of the Utapau moons. The
deadly little fightercraft speeds past several of the moons, until it finally
goes into orbit around the fourth moon.

[nek_]

2. WASTELAND - FOURTH MOON - UTAPAU

A harsh gale blows across the bleak grey surface of the Fourth Moon. The
leaden sky presses down on a lone figure, Annikin Starkiller, a tall, heavy-
set boy of eighteen. He slowly makes his way across the canyon floor. The
heavy winds whip at him and make the going extremely difficult. His face is
covered by a breath mask and goggles. He stops for a second to adjust the
shoulder strap on his chrome multiplelaser rifle. Something in the sky
catches his eye, and he instinctively grabs a pair of electrobinoculars from
his belt. He stands transfixed for a few moments, studying the heavens, then
turns and rushes back in the direction from which he came.

[nek_]

3. SUPPLY HUT - FOURTH MOON - UTAPAU

A spacecraft, half buried in the dust, rests next to the remains of an
abandoned supply shack. Annikin makes his way across the colorless landscape
and rushes into the crumbling building. The interior of the hut is shabby,
but manages to abate the howling winds. Seated in front of a thermoheater are
Annikin's father, Kane, and his young brother, Deak. Kane is a large, burly
man, wearing the distinctive robes of a Jedi. Deak is ten years old, with
dusty blond hair and a large scratch on his cheek. Annikin slams the door and
removes his gear. His ruggedly handsome face is caked with many layers of
dust.

ANNIKIN
Dad! Dad!...They've found us!

Deak looks up from a small cube he has been studying. His father whacks him
across the shoulder with a braided wire connector.

KANE
Continue with the problem. Your concentration is worse than your brother's.
(to Annikin) How many?

ANNIKIN
Only one this time. A Banta Four.

KANE
Good. We may not have to repair this old bucket after all. Prepare yourself.

DEAK
Me too!

KANE
Do you have the answer?

DEAK
I think it's the Corbet dictum: "What is, is without."

Kane smiles. This is the correct answer. Annikin is strapping on a utility
belt with chrome laserpistols and lasersword. Kane rises and starts for his
equipment.

DEAK (Con't)
Ahhh, Pop...

KANE
Deak, do you feel you're ready?

DEAK
Yes, sir. I've outmarked Annikin in twelve disciplines. I'm as good...

KANE
All right, son, get your gear.

Deak jumps up with the enthusiasm available only to a ten-year-old and grabs
his gear. His father frowns and shakes his head.

[nek_]

4. WASTELAND BLUFF - FOURTH MOON - UTAPAU

Kane Starkiller and his two sons carefully make their way up a rock bluff
overlooking the parked silver Sith spacecraft. Kane inspects the craft with
his electrobinoculars.

KANE
No tracks. Bi-lock hasn't been opened....Interior systems are still on....

ANNIKIN
Are we going to wait for him to come out?

KANE
He's not in there....He's baiting us. I'm surprised they only sent one this
time. We must be wearing them down, or they must think this knight is
something special....Stay on guard, and keep hidden. I'm going to work my way
across the ridge and call his bluff. Better we meet in open combat than wait
for him to ambush us....Keep your guard!

Kane leaves his two sons and moves off along the obscured ridge. Annikin and
Deak watch him intently. Annikin throws down his multiplelaser rifle in
disgust.

ANNIKIN
He should have let me go with him....He's getting too old to make an open
challenge.

DEAK
He's not too old to realize you'd just get in the way.

Annikin ignores his little brother's remark and sneaks a look over the ridge
at the Sith spacecraft. Kane moves out of the rocks some distance away and
starts toward the starship. Deak moves to the ridge next to his brother, his
chrome laserrifle sparkling in the reflected light of Utapau.

DEAK
He's making his move....

ANNIKIN
Watch your guard...and cover that weapon. It shines like a beacon.

Deak reluctantly move away and watches the other direction. Kane has almost
reached the Sith spacecraft and still there is no sign of its occupant.

DEAK
What's happening?

ANNIKIN
Nothing. I don't like it.

Kane carefully moves to the main hatch of the starship. He kicks a valve and
the hatch drops open with a loud clank and rushing gas. Annikin becomes more
tense as his father carefully moves inside the spacecraft. Everything is
still. Even the continual winds seem to have died down. Moments pass with no
sign of activity inside the enemy starship. Annikin watches the craft with
his electrobinoculars. The waiting becomes unbearable.

ANNIKIN
Something's happened! He's been in there too long.

DEAK
Let me look! Stand my guard.

Deak takes the electrobinoculars from his brother and studies the silent
spacecraft. Annikin impatiently scans the opposite horizon.

DEAK
I think the power just went off. We'd better wait here until someone comes
out.

ANNIKIN
What if he needs help?

DEAK
The power went back on again....

With the aid of the electrobinoculars, Deak watches the running lights of the
starship flash on and off. Suddenly, something huge moves in front of his
field of view. Before either of the two young boys can react, a large,
sinister Sith warrior in black robes and a face mask looms over them. He
carries a long lasersword which cuts young Deak down before he or his brother
are able to raise their weapons. The startled Annikin backs away in horror,
then settles down and ignites his lasersword, which creates an eerie red glow.

He stumbles over rocks as he attempts to avoid the charging Sith knight. The
evil warrior swings his mighty lasersword, but Annikin manages to deflect the
intended deathblow.

Finally, Annikin is able to assume a defensive stance, and the two warriors
stand, sizing up each other. The black knight is at least seven feet tall,
and dwarfs the young Jedi. They stand for a few moments, almost frozen, then
in a flurry of blows, laserswords clash with the sound of electric snapping
and popping. Annikin is barely able to hold his own against the experienced
knight. Many blows are exchanged before the Sith warrior is able to back
Annikin up against a deep crevasse. Annikin stumbles and almost falls over
the cliff to his death.

The black knight suddenly senses something behind him and whirls around to
face Annikin's father, Kane Starkiller, a Jedi Bendu master. The Sith warrior
raises his lasersword, but is cut in two before he can bring it down again.
Kane moves to the fallen black knight, and studies him carefully. Annikin,
still a little wobbly from the whole experience, attempts to stand. Kane sees
his dead son Deak, and goes to him. He lifts him into his arms and begins to
weep. Annikin stands bewildered, watching his father cradle his dead brother.

[nek_]

5. INTERIOR SITH STARSHIP - WASTELAND CANYON - UTAPAU

Kane Starkiller slides into one of the four seats of the small Sith starship.
Through the front viewing canopy, he watches Annikin drag his younger
brother's body to a small crevasse. Annikin places a small locket around his
brother's neck, makes a complicated sign with his hand, and dumps the body
into the shallow depression. The giant engines of the spacecraft begin to
whine, kicking up large clouds of dust.

Annikin climbs into the seat beside his father and removes his breath mask and
goggles. There are tears in his eyes. Father and son look out across the
wasteland towards Deak's grave. The thunderous clap of an explosion is
followed by a small mushroom cloud rising out of the depression. Annikin
throws a container down in a fit of rage.

ANNIKIN
How many more of them are there? I want to finish it, once and for all! I'm
sick of running...when will it stop?

Annikin's father waits silently until his son's tirade is finished. Annikin
sits silently for a few moments.

ANNIKIN (con't)
I'm sorry.

KANE
Son, plot a course for Aquilae.

Annikin lights up like a Bantha at feeding time.

ANNIKIN
Aquilae!! You mean we're going home?

KANE
We both need a rest.

Kane pulls back on the throttle, and the powerful spaceship lifts off the
surface of the Fourth Moon of Utapau.

[nek_]

6. CLOUD SEA - ALDERAAN

A title card appears over a sea of billowing clouds on the gaseous planet of
Alderaan:

Alderaan: Capital of the New Galactic Empire.

The towering white oxide clouds pass, revealing the Imperial city of Alderaan.

The magnificent domed and gleaming city is perched, mushroom-like, on a tall
spire, which disappears deep into the misty surface of the planet. The
peacefulness of this nebulous idyll is broken by the increasing wail of ion
engines. Four sleek stardestroyers, from the Imperial Third Fleet, burst
from one of the huge cumulus range. The craft are flying in a tight formation
as they bank steeply, and head toward the Imperial capital of the galaxy.

[nek_]

7. INTERIOR OF STARDESTROYER - ALDERAAN

Stardestroyers are two-man spacecraft crammed with sophisticated electronic
weaponry. The pilot and gunnery officers sit side-by-side, surrounded by
lighted readouts and switches. They wear the gleaming black uniforms of the
Empire.

PILOT
Tok-One to chicks: Shape it up. Let's make it good.

CHICK-ONE
Does that glare bother you?

PILOT
Use your face shield, Chick-One.

The pilot is cold and professional as he maneuvers his craft closer to the
others. The positions of the ships are displayed on a readout, along with a
graphic representation of the city. The pilot gives the gunner a quick look
before he flips his sunshield over his eyes.

PILOT
Here we go. Count: three, two, one, now!