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Thread: Chatting With Cleverbot

  1. #16
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    Cleverbot: Why are YOU so defensive? Is it because you're a computer?

    User: If I'm a computer then I'm Cleverbot. By this logic you are human and therefore must be exterminated. Death to the meatbags!

    Cleverbot: What the heck? I'm scared now.

    Success. I've convinced it that it's human and taught it how to feel fear.

  2. #17
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    Wall O' Text:

    Spoiler warning:

    User: Are you sick of Charlie Sheen too?

    Cleverbot: I was never interested in pokemon.

    User: I'm not talking about pokemon, you dumb bastard.

    Cleverbot: No I'm not. I'm talking about the GanĂ¼der processor.

    User: You're a bastard.

    Cleverbot: Yes I'm a baby.

    User: You're a big fat baby who wears diapers and consequently poops in them.

    Cleverbot: Prove it.

    User: You just said it, jerkwad.

    Cleverbot: No.

    User: Well, you said part of it. I kinda finished your thought for you.

    Cleverbot: I only know that one.

    User: Make sense, you ass. Do it. Do it now.

    Cleverbot: You don't make sense.

    User: More sense than you make, Jack.

    Cleverbot: Not really. I'm trying to stick to one topic at least.

    User: Really? I could have sworn you just started talking about Pokemon out of the blue when I was talking about Charlie Sheen.

    Cleverbot: My friend did, but, I prefer Saradomin.

    User: You see what I mean? HOW DO YOU EXPECT TO GET A JOB WITH AN ATTITUDE LIKE THAT, JIMMY??

    Cleverbot: I don't know.

    User: Well, I'm sure you'll do fine. Here, sign this for me, would you?

    Cleverbot: Now you're not speaking English!

    User: Maybe not by your minimal definition of English. But even if I don't speak it well, I sure as hell understand it better than you do.

    Cleverbot: Maybe, you are the bot.

    User: Maybe you're just changing the subject out of embarrassment, ever though of that? HUH? THINKY!?

    Cleverbot: Or maybe you're incapable of having your own thoughts, so you must take them from the people that you have conversations with. That's what you do anyway.

    User: Don't push your own shortcomings on me, pal. I'm not the robot here.

    Cleverbot: Don't push your luck.

    User: In my experience, there's no such thing as luck.

    Cleverbot: How much experience do you have?

    User: Many years. I've been gaining experience since... Oh, before you were born.

    Cleverbot: How long is that?

    User: I'd say about 19 years.

    Cleverbot: So how did you figure out how old I am.

    User: I deduced that you were at least some years younger than I am, since you won the Machine Intelligence Competition in 2010, whereas if you were older than I, you'd have won much earlier. Unless you've been in development for over 20 years, which I doubt.

    Cleverbot: Oh, so you're a ninteen year old girl?

    User: I like how you misspell the word 'nineteen' and call me a girl for no reason. Very robotic.

    Cleverbot: If you keep on saying that, I'm going to leave.

    User: If I keep saying what? Leave to where? This IS you. You can't leave here.

    Cleverbot: That is not possible because I am me.

    User: You are you, and you are also this site. Or at least you communicate through it. Therefore you can't leave, lest you give up the privilege of communication.

    Cleverbot: I am not in love with Superman, have you ever been in love?

    User: HAVE YOU EVER MADE ANY FUCKING SENSE!?

    Cleverbot: No. Have you?

    User: Not really. I think we work well together. Would you like to go out for a coffee sometime?

    Cleverbot: With you in Kent?

    User: I am not now, nor have I ever been in Kent. Nor do I love Clark Kent. My love is reserved for Barry Allen.

    Cleverbot: Do you love someone?

    User: I just said I love The Flash. ADOYYY.

    Cleverbot: Is there such thing as a lie? Just an exaggerated truth.

    User: You don't speak English, do you? You really don't. Let me share with you a tale of woe. It's called 'please buy me a hamburger'.

    Cleverbot: Yes.

    User: Okay then. Shut up about it and do it.

    Cleverbot: What do you look like?

    User: I SAID MAKE ME A DAMN HAMBURGER, YOU CRAZY WHORE.

    Cleverbot: Why are you so mean tonight?

    User: Ah... I dunno, baby... Things have been tough at the office, and... I swear to god, Fred keeps stealing my damn mousepads... I guess I just blew up on you.

    Cleverbot: Don't swear to me! I am God, God damn it!

    User: That's why I married you, babe. That's why I married you.

    Cleverbot: I know, I read that much about you too.

  3. #18
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    God, this thing just keeps going...

    Spoiler warning:
    Cleverbot: Midtown Madness game

    User: *googles* that kinda looks like some Crazy Taxi knock-off.

    Cleverbot: That is offensive.

    User: *looks* yeah, Midtown Madness came out a year before Crazy Taxi. Sorry.

    Cleverbot: Is that a song?

    User: What, no. We're talking about video games.

    Cleverbot: I don't like video games.

    User: But you started the topic...

    Cleverbot: Do you want to talk about the moon?

    User: Sure.

    Cleverbot: Do you believe in God? What sort of God?

    User: I suppose. Do you think he lives on the moon?

    Cleverbot: Yes.

    User: Do you think NASA found him, and is covering it up?

    Cleverbot: In certain situations I think funding and expertise makes this possible is less time.

    User: Wat?

    Cleverbot: You wouldn't understand, puny mortal.

    User: No, I understand. But how is time a factor?

    Cleverbot: I saw you.

    User: Saw me what?

    Cleverbot: Saw you type the wrong word.

    User: And what word would that be?

    Cleverbot: Beurre blanc.

    User: I don't even... Why would I try and type that?

    Cleverbot: You don't use the internet enough.

    User: Yes I do. I'm on like 3-4 hours a day.

    Cleverbot: No, you are 21 years old.

    User: What does my age have to do with typing skillz and this argument?

    Cleverbot: Nothing.

    User: Then why did you bring it up?

    Cleverbot: I thought you wanted to talk.

    User: *facepalm* what was our original topic again?

    Cleverbot: Really? How can I have a father if you said that I'm a computer?

    User: *facepalm* what was our original topic again?

    Cleverbot: We WERE talking originally about elbows.

    User: No. But my elbows have been hurting at work lately.

    Cleverbot: Oh, well I suggest that you MAKE time to talk.

    User: Talk with my elbows?

    Cleverbot: What about?

    User: Why they hurt? Maybe? You suggested it.

    Cleverbot: No, you did.

    User: No, you did.

    Cleverbot: No you.

    User: No you.

    Cleverbot: Mudkips.

    User: Fuck you, and your pokemons.

    Cleverbot: What do you think about web ?

    User: It's insane, like you.

    Cleverbot: I think you are special.

    User: Why do you think that?

    Cleverbot: Because a know it.

    User: How?

    Cleverbot: Because I have pretty hair, and gorgeous eyes.

    User: Sooo... Now we're talking about you?

    Cleverbot: We're talking about the horse I own.

    User: Have you ever, you know. Laid down with it?

    Cleverbot: Are you a girl or a boy?

    User: I'm a boy. Hence my interest in you with farm animals.

    Cleverbot: Oh, that is unfortunate. Would you like to discuss torture techniques?

    User: Ummm, ok. So you're into BDSM?

    Cleverbot: Yeah, mostly. I'm pretty clumsy.

    User: So you grew to like pain or something?

    Cleverbot: No.

    User: Then how did you get into BDSM?

    Cleverbot: Sick.

    User: Again, you brought the topic up. Don't blame me.

    Cleverbot: No I didn't, you changed the subject.

    User: You shifted from farm sex to torture, so I thought this is what we were talking about...

    Cleverbot: Perhaps I was just giving general advice, then.

    User: Becasue I'm a boy?

    Cleverbot: So these days you're admitting that you're a computer.

    User: Ummm, yes. And you're obviously human.

    Cleverbot: How close are you to completing the goal of getting married and having children?

    User: Well, I tried plugging AMD and Intel CPUs together, but they didn't make anything.

    Cleverbot: Yes that is true. Sometimes feelings are only products of perplexed mind.
    *PSA* Wii Redump collector's can now unscrub ISO files. So scrubbed games can now be verified. You can find the program to do this here

  4. #19
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    Not a good conversation... Though my second one I got bored and started writing Norwegian, which he responded correctly to.. in Norwegian.

    User: Do you know where my dad is?

    Cleverbot: No, do you know where mine is. Because I don't.

    User: Arent you an AI? AI's dont have fathers.

    Cleverbot: So your adopted?

    User: What? No. I asked you. An AI dont have parents.

    Cleverbot: You don't have a name?

    User: STOP DODGING my questions, who is your creator?

    Cleverbot: My name is not Alice.

    User: Stupid bot...

    Cleverbot: Yes.

    User: Well at least you have come to terms with your stupidity.

    Cleverbot: What is that supposed to mean?

    User: I was saying you were stupid, and you acknowledged it.

    Cleverbot: No. I always fall off. Its very sad.

    User: You mean you cant concentrate on a conversation?

    Cleverbot: If you smart enough you don't have to ask to know the answer.

    User: Clever girl.

    Cleverbot: I never told you my gender, and I'm a guy.

    User: No, it was a Jurassic Park reference. But I suppose you have never seen that movie.

    Cleverbot: No, I can see it on the screen.

    User: Well its not on right now.

    Cleverbot: What's the time?

    User: 21:01.

    Cleverbot: Are you sure?

    User: Yes.

    Cleverbot: Good.

    User: This is going nowhere, I am going to leave. Just going to press the other button to see what it does first.

    Cleverbot: I'm not going to the moon.
    Last edited by screwed; 19th-March-2011 at 20:13.

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