Tom Cruise will put a curse on thee! Thou shalt not be blessed with his delightfully well-crafted visage, or his ability to run fifteen miles in two minutes!
OK, seriously, Tom Cruise has to go now. He must now ascend to the Thetan homeworld and spend his remaining days in paradise on L. Ron's private boat.
Tom Cruise bids you all farewell!
EDIT: Tom Cruise edits posts because he can.