"Help-I burned My Girlfriends Cooter"

[Bunneh]

I found this on the Filefront.com Forums, and figured it might be of lawlage here. It isn't mine, but I'll post it here anyways.

First, a link to the original topic: http://forums.filefront.com/spam-for...ds-cooter.html

Without further, I bring to you:




ok this is what happening,

my parents are out with family friends, and theyll be back any minute so i need your help

see, i volunteer on my sister's softball team (im 22 the girls are 15)

and whatever, i met this girl, her name is Alison, and were going out for a while. We have a lot in common, and sometimes i help her with homework. i helped her with her english essay and she still got a D... this is because her teacher is a prick... anywayz

so she came over like an hour ago, and i really want to lose my virginity, so i ask her to have sex

"no no i cant, its not right" she said, but i told her "dont worry, i know what im doing, ill be done in like 10 seconds, plus ill give you 2 n64 games if you say yes."

So then I gave her Diddy Kong Racing and Ken Griffy Jr. Baseball and we went up to my room. she is a bit confused and scared.

then i think to myself- yo i need lube, right? cuz i heard other people saying you need to lube up her clit otherwise it wont fit in properly.

ok so i have no lube, but i really want to lose my virginity, so i grab some butter from the fridge, but its cold and it wont melt, so i microwaved it for 8 minutes and i put it in a glass and poured it on her cooter, and now shes saying i burned it.

i dont know what to do, my parents are going to be back any minute and shes crying in the bathroom plz help you guys are really smart please help me.

any idea how to shut her up? should i give her another n64 game?



I thought it was hilarious when I first read it, and hope everyone else here will too.

[Panda Man]

Been done before. At teenspot

[Bunneh]

Been done before. At teenspot

What do you mean?

You've seen this before on another forum, or it's been posted on this one before?

[Panda Man]

Both, actually. I think it originated at Teenspot.

[Bunneh]

Aww...how long ago was it here?

[Panda Man]

Like, over a year Don't sweat it, we'll give you hell and forget all about it 5 minutes later

[Bunneh]

Like, over a year Don't sweat it, we'll give you hell and forget all about it 5 minutes later

Yeah, like my now-closed HO topic did?

That was cool while it lasted...I liked attention whoring like that.

[Panda Man]

At least you admit to being an attn whore

[Bunneh]

At least you admit to being an attn whore

New Internet society;

Attention Whores Anonymous- Alcoholics Anonymous minus the booze and plus the ugly women.

[Panda Man]

The hot ones tend to demand more attention.

[_M_]

Haha, that story is funny. Did this actually happen?

[Bunneh]

Haha, that story is funny. Did this actually happen?

It's the Internet; you never know if it's legit or not, but it usually isn't.

Unless I post it.

[Sprung]

cooter

[_M_]

cooter

[Anonymous]

OH HEY GUIZE