What's the stupidest e-mail you've ever gotten?

[alarel]

So, what's the stupidest e-mail anyone's ever sent you? This does not include spam or newsletters, etc. but Forwards still count. You don't have to say the whole e-mail or anything, you can just describe it.

I have two-
Isn't this one a little ironic? Here's the title-
Fwd: This is so cool- pleez look at this( its not a forward)

The second is when my friend wrote two e-mails to my e-mail address so she could remind herself of something she wanted to tell me when she came to my house. When she came over, she said, "CHECK YOUR E-MAIL!" And her e-mails started with:
"Self,
(whatever they said)

From myself,
Firemage10"

[Gnafu the Great]

"Dear Sir,

I visited your website (www.geocites.com/la_ogre_accounting_firm) at Geocities devoted to providing the most compelling information aimed at resolving discussing Issues related to Government, Environment and Violence, that gives an insight into your background and keen interests as well. The site is registry of resources and information essentially to Netizens and Cyber savvies, aimed at offering them a comprehensive Platform for voicing their angles of thought . It reflects your enduring efforts in adding new and elementary features to the website in order to satisfy the interest of the browser.

The site is well presented with a neat design and content, complimented with easy navigational tools which truly induces viewers to come back for more. Congrats on an excellent interface. I feel that it deserves much more than being hosted with geocities, as most of the visitors and aspiring computer students interested in following closely with the latest updates might not be aware of its existence and they would not be benefited from the repository of information the site has.

The irrelevant ad banner of Geocities on the right hand side of the page also tends to distract the users attention. Moreover, you could be missing out on the features and services that your service provider may not be able to give you in reaching out to a wider audience. This is where we could help you with our relentless pursuit of a single goal - helping our clients communicate at a higher level.

I work in the marketing department of ADDR.com (ADDR.com is a professional web hosting and web design provider currently servicing over 60,000 customers) and we are currently running a special offer. I want to offer you 3 months of web hosting absolutely free of charge to give you a chance to try out our services.

Our current offer of free web hosting coupled with cutting edge services will help you reach out to millions of people through the net, which dramatically increases your traffic and strengthens your presence on the web.

In addition to our sophisticated programs developed to respond faster to our customers, we provide services like round the clock technical support and maintenance of your site. Leaving no lead time in the process, you will witness transforming experience of being one of our 60000 satisfied customers all around the world. A detailed information on our services can be obtained at <http://www.addr.com/services.htm>.

To sign up, simply go to our web site (<http://www.addr.com/>) and go through the standard ordering form. There is no need to provide a credit card number, simply select "pay by check" option for now and mention "3 months free of hosting from John McLane" in the "How did you hear about us" field. Also, I would appreciate it if you could send me a quick email with your Username to let me know that you signed-up so that I can ensure you get the 3 months free here on my end.

Should you decide to cancel at any time, you will of course not be charged. In fact, we will get in touch with you after 3 months to find out how you liked our services and if you would like to continue with ADDR.com.

Please feel free to email me if you require any clarifications. I can also offer you a great rate for a professional redesign of your web site. Let me know if this is something that would interest you.


Thanks!


Best Regards,

John Mclane
[email protected]
www.addr.com




P.S. If you like, for your convenience, we can actually transfer your web site files for you free of charge. Just let me know."

My site doesn't have anything on it. This is a site layout I had made with Geocities a long time ago, it has nothing of what he's talking about. All they did was scan my site for keywords and hope they were right. It's hilarious, but what they say my site is is what I wanted it to be. I never got around to finishing the site anyway.

[Nipedley]

This is a stupid email from a stupid person. (Shh, dont tell!)
"Hey Admin Sorry About What Happe nOn Teh Forums Plz UNban Meh Im Sorry

~Geris"

[((KvN))]

^^LOL's

I deleted it right away. Title:

"Try Penis Enlargement Pills Now" OMFG! lol

[Solitude]

it started with some sloppy stuff on friendship with unoriginal written all over it then,it ended with something like this if you don't want something horrible to happen to the person who sent you this mail,you will forward this to 10 more people.so obviously i didn't forward,because if the guy was dense enough to send me such a stupid mail then world wouldn't miss much without him.the sad part is,nothing ever happened to him

[Wulf]

Stupid emails? Hrmm.

Well, this one guy that I met at <a href="http://www.dark-dominion.com">DD</a>, a real arsehole, emailed me to carry on a dispute we had on the forums.

Not feeling like arguing at the time, i just said "interesting" and "inderd" at him until he went away.

Then there was a time when some arse was sending me stuff about some animal farm sex site, with descriptive titles like "From Terra", even though I don't know any terras. He's still probably going at it with my old email adress...

[MasterOfGravity]

Originally posted by ((X ZreX))
^^LOL's

I deleted it right away. Title:

"Try Penis Enlargement Pills Now" OMFG! lol

HEY I got that one a couple of days ago...thats one of the top stupid things for me to

[((KvN))]

Really?! I tried it, you?









Just a joke, ok! lol

[Howie]

I get this message from [email protected]

"Warning: THIS IS NOT SPAM!"

Yeah, bite me.

[Harmony]

With my old email account where I used the bogus name 'Bill Gates' I got a mail that read 'Bill Gates, I found your credit card'. 1) that's a bogus name and 2) I don't even have a credit card

[Drageuth]

Spam.

[NaturalMystic]

Originally posted by ((X ZreX))
^^LOL's

I deleted it right away. Title:

"Try Penis Enlargement Pills Now" OMFG! lol

lol i get that all the time too
its really annoying
thats prolly the stupidest email i've gotten...

[Hipoccolos]

"Dear webmaster,

I saw my son visiting your site "Dumbasses Anonymous" and was quite appaled at what he was looking at. It is filth like your website that makes it so difficult to let my son online. I have contacted Geocities and they will be shutting your website down for good. It is they least they could do, you deserve more punishment.

Diane Axt"
[email protected]

What a dumbass, IGNORANT *****! My response was something among the lines of....

"Look, dumbass, your kind are exactly what I put on my site. How old is your son? He's probably at least 14 I bet, and you're making a big deal of this. Geocities doesn't give a flying shit what my site has and they won't be shutting me down. Idiots like yourself have tried shutting me down before and they failed too, just because you're an "adult" doesn't mean that will change anything. Have a nice life, and shut the fuck up for all our sakes. !."


My site isn't all that bad or offensive, except maybe to the people that got put on it. I can't believe this E-mail.

[LitBolt]

I don't like people like that either... .

I only send stupid E-Mails, I don't recieve them. (jk)

Umm... Those penis enlargers I get quite a lot of. Also things from various porn sites, and fake contests, and most of the other usual spam that people get.

[Lord Riff Raff]

Well this is todays annoying email.
<HR>

DEAR FRIEND,

I humbly wish to seek your assistance in a matter that is very important and needs utmost trust and confidence. I am samuel coker, A business Consultant.And a close confidant of one of the South-African most powerful family. The wife of former top Government official, a Gold magnet . late Dr BAMUNGA SANGO MBEKI, Former Junior Minister of Mines and Power , Republic of South-Africa.
Unfortunately, he died of heart attack soon after handing over because the new Government wanted to probe his activities while in office for financial misappropriations.
Presently, All their foreign and local acounts was frozen and their assets confiscated.
The wife, who is now on her sick bed helplessly since her husbands death with
her only son to look after, wishes to move out of South-Africa the sum of USD$75
million . She wishes to invest the forementioned sum on real estate property/viable
investments overseas. For obvious reasons, My client does not want to place this fund with established financial institution with the family name for security reasons.
It is her desire that the deal be handled as quietly as possible without possibility of any leakage to the public or Government. She has therefore empowered me to find and negotiate for a reliable and trustworthy foreigner who can assist.
Us by using his/her name in moving the money to a foreign safe account and who can assist to invest the fund properly for the family. If you agree to act as a fund manager for my client and the family, I shall release the sum of $75
USD[seventy five million united states dollars] to you if you meet my requirements.
The money is available safe with a private security company coded and lodged in with a fictitious name. Upon a favorable response from you, I shall let you know the steps involve. Your commission shall be down payment of 25% of the total sum, and annual 10% of the after tax returns on investment for the first 5 years. Thereafter, the terms shall be re-negotiated.
If you are capable and willing to participate in this transaction contact me through my email address . IF FOR ANY REASON YOU ARE NOT DISPOSED AT THE MOMENT TO UNDERTAKE THIS DEAL, LET ME KNOW ON TIME SO AS TO MAKE ALTERNATIVE ARRANGEMENT.BECAUSE I WILL NOT CONACT ANOTHER PERSON UNTILL I HEAR FROM YOU.

Yours faithfully,

SAMUEL COKER.